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Emoji Award given by @MoansInSignLanguage: "marseyscooter"

Emoji Award given by @snallygaster: "marseywholesome"

NeedForStuffing big/nerd Trans-fullfrontallobotomy. Professional Retard, Amateur Dramanaut

10mo ago (oceangate.com) Edited 10mo ago 3,720 thread views #180842

EFFORTPOST Das Tuub | Titanic R-sluration

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I just found out about this submarine like an hour ago. I feel really bad for the people trapped inside, especially the kid, but they kinda deserve it for even getting on this thing. Everyone's laughing at the CEO for his dumbass DEI policies, but this is just surface level stuff (lol). No one's actually explained the depths of how r-slurred this guy and his company are, so I thought I'd take some time out of my actual engineering job while I'm sitting in a boring butt zoom meeting to properly call this guy a fricking r-slur, so you can all find this just as funny as I do. I thought you all might appreciate it a little more than just some sporadic tweets about the DEI shit he did. This is going to be like a Challenger-style breakdown and what exactly went wrong so you can appreciate this frick-up.

There's gonna be a lot of naval puns in this so bear with me here. A lot of this is coming from my friend, also an engineer, who's done more research into this than I have.

In the Boatginning

Dramatards, I'd like to introduce you to Stockton Rush. Owner of the the most startup founder-ish name in history, this guy has been making janky submarines his entire life. He got his start in the aerospace industry, as a test engineer on the F-15 with McDonnell-Douglass. Anyone familiar with the industry will note that experience with McDonnell-Douglass is not necessarily a good thing on your resume.

https://www.businessinsider.in/international/news/maker-of-the-lost-titanic-sub-once-told-a-reporter-that-at-some-point-safety-is-just-pure-waste/amp_articleshow/101143398.cms

He's made a career out of building submarines that are cheaper and more accessible to the general population, and his company, OceanGate, has had a few successful designs. What's notable about his history, however, is that he's made them cheaper largely by bypassing safety standards. His first submarine that they operated was called Antipodes, was a refit sub built by a different company. Originally intended for research purposes, they used it instead for tourist dives.

The first actual submarine they built was the Cyclops 1, a carbon-fiber (we'll come back to this part) submarine controlled using a PlayStation controller, with an operational depth of 500m. The submarine is deployed/recovered from some weird floating drydock concept, which crucially allows them to not use human rated cranes to recover the submarine.

After seeing some moderate success, he's gone and built the submarine in question, the Titan, which is built from a composite carbon-fiber and titanium. They bought the hull from a company called Spencer Composites, who intended it to be SINGLE USE. The submarine was built to a factor-of-safety (multiple of how much of the expected load you can withstand before it breaks) of 2.25 (which is frick-all, especially for a submarine - should be at least 6, probably more like 10). . A lot of journ*lists who went on board the thing noted that most of the parts on the interior were sourced from local hardware stores, as were the ballast tanks. They were not, as you could imagine, comfortable about being on board once they realized this.

DEI-ing At Sea

https://twitter.com/CatchUpFeed/status/1671372796876984320?s=20

This guy's team is a bunch of young, impressionable diversity hires. He's explicitly avoided anyone with experience because they are old and white and men. They're not very inspirational, and so they don't have a place on Rush's team.

Anyone who has worked on an engineering project before knows that any engineer with less than 2 years of practical experience is a massive drain on the project and need to be babysat constantly, ESPECIALLY if they might kill someone. They're usually worth investing in because they'll give you a great return in the long run, but boy are those first couple of years hard.

I didn’t hire experienced people because I’m a racist

oh no my boat sank, how could this have possibly happened

:#marseypikachu2:

This is going to go a long way to explain why what happened did happen, so buckle up.

Frick-up #1: Carboat-Fiber

Let's talk materials for a second. Carbon-fiber is what's called a composite material, because it's made from a couple of different types of material. You have the carbon fibers themselves, which are really resistant to being stretched in-plane (like pulling apart a sheet of paper), but have very little strength out of plane (like poking a hole in paper) or off-axis (they're woven into almost a cloth, if you pull at a 60 degree angle to that weave, they lose 80% of their strength).

Carbon fibers are usually set in place with solidified plastics, like epoxy. It solves a lot of problems as far as directional strength goes, but you still need to be careful with it. In a specific configuration, it has similar material properties to a common aerospace aluminium alloy (T-6061), while being a fraction of the weight. Great for airplanes and race cars, where mass is a factor.

Steel is the best material, and the only reason you use anything else is either because you don't want it to rust, or because you can't use steel. It's cheap, strong, and (crucially) it can be stressed over and over again without building up stress fractures. If you keep it under a certain limit, it will never break. NO OTHER MATERIAL DOES THIS.

This makes ideal for something that you're going to put under pressure, and then remove it from that pressure, over and over and over again, in a scenario where weight isn't a factor. Like, say, a submarine.

Stockton Rush, however, is way too cool for steel :marseysmug3: . He has instead decided to build his submarine out of the super cool airplane material, without understanding why its there in the first place. Composite materials are generally vulnerable to snapping if they're loaded repeatedly, which is why the company that built this refused to endorse it after finding out it was going to be used like it was.

It's never been used on submarines before, and with really good reason. It's not just not an optimal choice, it's literally the worst one possible. From the Business Insider article:

The Titan sub was never checked to see if it was up to standard because of its "innovation," OceanGate said in 2019. The sub features a carbon fiber hull that had never been used on submersibles before, according to the "Unsung Science" podcast.

:#marseypain:

Rush managed to bypass safety standards yet again by using completely different materials and then claiming that the standards aren't relevant. They make you sign a massive waiver when you sign up. No one has actually checked if this thing is safe. There's no standard it's being held to, there's no regulation, no third-party review. No matter how good you are, you can always frick up. Their cavalier attitude towards safety has now probably killed the CEO and four other people.

From their blog:

Maintaining high-level operational safety requires constant, committed effort and a focused corporate culture – two things that OceanGate takes very seriously and that are not assessed during classification.

But it's ok, because they have a corporate culture of safety.

Frick-up #2: Electronixed

So this is an interesting note that I found is that the submarine has no onboard navigational system,. Yes, you read that correctly. They operate it by having a different ship monitor its position, and then send it text messages telling it where it is.

Journ*list David Pogue, who rode in Titan to view the Titanic in 2022, noted that Titan was not equipped with an emergency locator beacon; during his expedition, the surface support vessel lost track of the Titan "for about five hours, and adding such a beacon was discussed. They could still send short texts to the sub, but did not know where it was. It was quiet and very tense, and they shut off the ship's internet to keep us from tweeting."

:#marseyspit:

These people are all going to die

That's part of the reason they can't find it, is because the submarine doesn't know where it is, and can't tell anyone even if it did. It even failed before, and they still didn't fix it. That's not just stupid, it's criminally negligent.

The controls of this thing consist of a single button, and is piloted by a PlayStation controller. I'll point out that the idea of using a gamepad as a submarine helm control is not necessarily a bad one, and was actually implemented by USN submariners to great success. It's intuitive to zoomer helmsmen, really easy to teach, and was actually a way better control scheme than what they were using before. That being said, USN submarines are extremely well designed, very redundant, and extremely well-built. This stupid thing has none of that.

Because of the lack of navigation and emergency beacon, these people are very likely going to die, and it's going to be very unpleasant. It's really hard to find submarines even when they want to be found, and there's still no means of even rescuing these people even if they're found. They've got anti-submarine-warfare aircraft searching and everything, but still nothing.

Frick-up #3: Oxy-Constants

I can't think of a good pun for this. There's no real good source on this that I've seen because it's kind of an obscure problem, but they also fricked up the gas lines on the ship.

When maintaining an atmosphere for people to breathe, you have to be pretty careful with the gas composition. You need gas cyclers to remove CO2 buildup, and replace it with oxygen. Nitrogen doesn't need to be replaced because it's not consumed. This is standard on airplanes, submarines, spacecraft, anything sealed. Failure to do this was infamously the cause of the Apollo 1 disaster, where a pure, high-pressure oxygen atmosphere caused a dramatic fire when some nylon started to overheat.

Can you guess what OceanGate have done?

:marsey#agree:

That's right, they've been injecting pure oxygen into the cabin, with untested electronics on board.

Jesus Christ, guys. You get so many startup CEOs bitching about safety standards, and every now and then when they push the limits, we all get a very public reminder of why they're there in the first place. And it usually costs the lives of people who were tricked into getting onto that stupid butt vehicle in the first place.

!effortposters

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Emoji Award given by @box: "marseywholesome"

404notfound they/them 10mo ago (text post) Edited 10mo ago 3,179 thread views #185082

EFFORTPOST Garry Chess promised to admit fabricating posts within 48 hours if I took down mine exposing he wasn’t a real doctor. He hasn’t. DMs inside.

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Summary:

Basically every doctor is given something called an NPI number by the federal government. Every state also gives out licenses to work there.

Garry said he went to Harvard, worked in New Mexico as a hematologist/oncologist and also said he had a 5 letter last name. I looked up all hematologists/oncologists who have ever been licensed in NM. (The NPI database shows this, you can search by taxonomy) None with a 5 letter last name went to Harvard. (He was challenging people to doxx him)

Like a month ago I asked him about this. First he said he didn’t have to be licensed in NM as he wasn’t practicing as a doctor, just overseeing the clinic. Then he said he changed his last name so it wasn’t actually 5 letters in the NPI system. Today he claims he was only licensed in CA. Btw maiden names are listed in the NPI database, pretty sure.

This is on top of him lying about donating marrow post cancer (not allowed) & some other crazy things like $100 tires for his lambo, pics of which he won’t post. Think there’s more car drama but wasn’t here for it and idc.

He also said he was terminal with Burkitt’s lymphoma and had 5-7 months but now says he’s in treatment and will go back to work soon (??).

When I called him out earlier he said to look up his former boss at some lab who had an NPI starting with the “T15”. NO NPI STARTS WITH T. They literally ALL start with 1.

I always assumed he worked in a lab but wasn’t a doctor since he has tons of pathology posts (diagnosing disease) and not much about treatment. Oncologists DO NOT DIAGNOSE.

Also I have NEVER EVER heard of someone who is both an ER physician and an oncologist (two separate taxonomies). There are oncologists for ICU/intermediate ICU etc who work at hospitals but they are NOT ER doctors.

He also frequently misspells HIPAA as HIPPA which is a privacy law that you literally see every fricking day even if you’re a secretary in healthcare.

Anyways it just never added up so I made the post, and he made a post saying I was jelly of not being the only cancer survivor (fair). Then he sent me a message asking for a truce.

I asked for proof such as his NPI number. He said no. I said I can’t help u unless I can verify someone with your demographics exists (like 7 letters of last name & oncologist in CA, so not even that specific)

Then I said I would take it down (to get him to confess). He then said would make a post where he admits he “fabricated” some stuff but still say he is a doctor. I gave him 48 hours. He’s doubling down. So now I’m posting again.

Original post I deleted:

Garry Chess: Fake Doctor? No hematologist/oncologist with a 5 letter last name has ever been license in NM who went to Harvard

It’s easy to search for yourself.

I asked him about it but it still doesn’t sit right with me, especially after people saying he lies about his cars etc. Garry says his NPI (national provider identifier, every doctor, dentist, PA, etc has one) is under his “old” (?) last name and he’s not licensed as he’s not practicing. The NPPES database includes providers with expired licenses, just FYI, so it’s a very convenient excuse he has changed his last name at some point.

He’s now saying he was licensed in CA and references someone whose NPI allegedly starts with T15. NPIs are 10 digits and start with 1. LITERALLY ALL OF THEM. They do not start with letters.

I think he’s actually a clinical director or similar LARPing as a doctor.

I hesitated to say anything just in case the cancer stuff was real but even that seems to be a changing story….

Idk about the car drama. Someone else can chime in.

Edit:

Lol

Edit 2:

Claims to have had Burkitt’s lymphoma 2x but donated marrow after first time.

Click here to see how strict the donation requirements are

That was first thing that got me really sus

Edit 3:

Okay so idk how many of us have gone through chemo but I did at 27 & otherwise healthy and I would almost fricking collapse in Target and have to sit on the bench in the pharmacy or lean on the cart sometimes with sweat pouring down my face so this is laughable. Sometimes I couldn’t even get my mail. My mom had to do my laundry bc I couldn’t physically carry it to the laundry room in my complex. Idk, maybe he’s a super human who could go hiking during a very intense chemo regimen (worse than the one I went through). Don’t doubt there are people who can but…. I’m sure most people’s bullshit detectors are off the charts rn.

Edit 4:

Just remembered…99% sure maiden names come up in parentheses when you search if someone updated their NPI info.

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SIMPSONIANTHIELITEDOOMER nice/kind ☆POSITIVE VIBE ZONE★ 10mo ago (image post) Edited 10mo ago 3,947 thread views #180615

EFFORTPOST UPDATE #8: I am tired and going to bed Janniecord is taking the janniecide well

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Right on schedule after the long weekend in which the jannies worked and Reddit employees had barbecues like normal people we are back! If you're just tuning in, you're a few dozen leak threads late. But the latest development was this:

https://rdrama.net/post/180607/at-last-jannycide-is-upon-us

which isn't leaky, but was the public announcement of this reckoning. And now without further ado, today's leaks:

:#marseydemopped: :#marseyspez:

Will update with meltdowns as they accumulate. Just wanted to get this thread up so they know I’m still watching, I’ve just been busy

:#marseybongojanny:

20:19 EST Gigajannies acknowledge the janniecide:

20:26 EST: jannies are taking to the white supremacist platform Twitter to sneed now

..and they’re crying about getting the rDrama treatment :marseycarptrollg#un:

https://twitter.com/jackdaniel8008/status/1671297523108007941?s=46

21:11 The #resignations channel is born

I lost another jannie groomercord account due to suspicious activity and I am now down to three. The walls are closing in.

:marseycarpd#evil:

But anyway they've created a #resignations channel and the infighting is starting back up

lol they're talking about me even though the word rdrama gets autodeleted :marseycarpshy#:

21:27 Intermission

While we wait for more shareworthy tantrums, @ForcedRegistrycel has collated some fun stuff about a dethroned /r/celebrities jannie, one @Vaprz, who is in ruins after losing 14 years of his life to moderating /r/celebrities only to be fired from a volunteer position. I would strongly recommend visiting his thread!

https://rdrama.net/post/180641/janicide-horror-stories-removed-as-moderator

21:57 Emotions run high

Tensions continue to mount in the newly-christened #resignations and /u/HKayn is repeatedly begging people not to make any rash, life-altering decisions like resigning from a moderator position or deleting one's Reddit account.

The users in the powerjannie Groomercord briefly consider whether turning Reddit over to other powermods is the best course of action.

AND THEY HAVE A NEW PLAN - DELETE FRICKING EVERYTHING! YEAH! BURN REDDIT TO THE GROUND!

They go on to rule this out. Not because Reddit would obviously just roll their deletions back, but because they (again) don't want to lose their positions or accounts :marseyxd#: :

/u/Meepster23, who our own @Julian_H_Cope calls "one of the few respectable mods", pulls the trigger and deletes his Reddit account!

...just kidding lol he lied.

While I have you here, give this a listen!

:#marseyjamming:

21:59 RAPIDFIRE UPDATES - SADMINS FUCKED AROUND AND FOUND OUT

Is the janniecide over? Six million mops in four hours always did seem suspicious. The numbers just don't add up. I'm not saying it didn't happen, but just like, think about it bro.

https://twitter.com/JackDaniel8008/status/1671332720729903104

I can't believe the jannie counteroffensive is winning lmao. Kill me.

:marseycarpsalute#: the fallen chadmins

23:29 BLIND KINKSTERS

I have no idea what this means but something about accessibility on p*rn subs for blind pornsick addicts??

They can’t name rDrama (literally! they made a bot to autodelete any messages containing “rDrama”!) but they’re talking about us. And chtorrr. And Marty the Hate Cat.

:#marseychtorrr2: :#marseyhomohitler:

A hyperautistic lunatic has noticed the reddit content policy is no longer available in English :marseythonk:

https://redditinc.com/policies/content-policy

23:50 Bedtime

Ok I am very bored and getting off now. What do you think will happen with the content policy?

Jannie-hostile changes, grace period to force compliance

Nothing lmao who even looks at that page you psycho it’s prolly been like that

No change, actual error

Uninspired meme choice, fear of being seen as incorrect

One final leak: they think random users who just add subs to their feed to scroll their FYP while they shit are going to rally to their heroic jannies’ defense :marseykneel:

Goodnight dramautists, pray that we all wake to a world free of jannies :#marseycarpsleeping:

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Joan_Wayne_Gacy presh/uss Shoulda kept that in the drafts 2mo ago (text post) 2,460 thread views #250409

EFFORTPOST Everyone that writes with a pen must DIE RIGHT FRICKING NOW - Watch a 70 year old company destroy itself with me.

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Greetings,

Back in the day people used to write words on pieces of paper. I know this is alien to most of you zoomers that think emojis evoke anything other than cringe and derision BUT we didn't always used to have iPhones and your penance for making that okay is dying from climate change. WITH THAT IN MIND - The fountain pen community is in absolute fricking shambles and it's so fun.

SO - Fountain pens are fancy white people pens that you fill with ink and shit and you use them to write fancy stupid shit on pieces of paper for gender reveal parties and funerals. For literal decades of years the German company LAMY has been the top c*nt of this world - they sell the fanciest pens and they sell the BEST ink that everyone uses and they essentially set the industry standard for all of the people that write shit on pieces of paper.

In 2016 LAMY released a limited edition pen and a limited edition ink to go with it - this ink was Dark Lilac. This ink was like the bees fricking knees. Impossible to recreate - had a golden sheen - did black-to-blue-to-purple like WOAH - this ink was impossible to ignore and no ink company has been able to replicate it since. This ink is basically the best thing to ever fricking happen to anyone ever.

LOOK AT THAT LIFE CHANGIN SHIT

LAMY has never re-released this shade of ink despite it's obvious cult status and most think it's because they literally can't - this was a flash in the pan accident at the factory and that's why no other ink company has been able to replicate that shit. WITH THIS IN MIND - mere days ago the LAMY company advertised two new limited edition pens and two new limited edition inks Safari Pink and VIOLET BLACKBERRY.

THE WORLD LITERALLY EXPLODED YALL

The fountain pen r-slurs were having the world's largest tard rage over whether or not this VIOLET BLACKBERRY was going to be DARK LILAC AND OMG FUFCKING SLKDFJLSKDFJLKSDJFkjk

1500 tard rages later LAMY released a statement saying that Violet Blackberry was an homage to Dark Lilac BUT keep in mind they did not say that it was Dark Lilac but NO ONE cared because they said the words "Dark Lilac" and everyone went absolutely fricking feral.

:redlight: :bluelight: TRAGEDY

European and Chinese re-sellers bought up ALLLLLL of the Violet Blackberry ink and started posting them online AS Dark Lilac (Temu grade shenanigans basically) because LAMY said it was an homage and no one knows what the frick the word "homage" means anymore because you all only speak in fricking emojis BUT bottles of legit Dark Lilac previously sold for literally thousands of dollars because it was a legit ONE TIME thing that cannot be replicated by any company ever because ~~it's probably full of lead and cancer~~ but when these bottles of Violet Blackberry started filling the market as a cheap version of Dark Lilac people went INSANE and bought them all because DARK LILAC OMG.

:redlight: :bluelight: TRAGEDY AGAIN

https://twitter.com/mikeycpa/status/1763633921294524728

SO everyone bought the fake Dark Liles and then once their little prezzies came in the mail they realized that THIS SHIT AINT DARK LILAC OMG - quelle fricking surprise.

https://twitter.com/sarah_cone/status/1763646231765557748

This new "Dark Lilac" didn't even fricking work half the time and was awful but those c*nts at LAMY never said it was Dark Lilac so everyone that bought all the fake shit overseas for wayyyyyy above market price for regular ink were just r-slurs that couldn't read, right? WRONG

LAMY chose the path of evil and released a public statement that Violet Blackberry was "in fact" also Dark Lilac and that you should totes keep buying all of those shitty bottles of Violet Blackberry under the assumption that they were Dark Lilac from shitty Chinese resellers.

Why they did this is beyond me but it didn't hold water for more than 8 hours as anyone that had used the new ink KNEW it was totally nothing like the old ink. Twitter tards called bullshit and got LAMY to make a statement and the statement was that they were "sorry about making the ink release with the name Dark Lilac" EVEN THO THEY DIDNT EVEN ORIGINALLY DO THAT. Total bullshit to cover up their re-seller shenanigans.

https://twitter.com/aidandvg1/status/1762578872837746932

SO no one bought any of their bullshit and twitter was INSANE about this shit. The backlash was so severe for two days and then LAMY as a company decided to SELL THEMSELVES TO MITSUBISHI - this happened literally hours ago. Totally insane. Everyone was laid off and LAMY as a company like literally DOES NOT EXIST anymore other than as an online retailer-front.

All because of a stupid fricking fountain pen ink.

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/h/groomers House Vampire

PlsNoCoal Pls/Nope i'm a skinwalking AGP 10mo ago (text post) 3,227 thread views #187633

EFFORTPOST actually funny The most trolled and documented groomer in history: Lorne Armstrong from To Catch a Predator (Part 1)

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Block /h/groomers

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There is perhaps no show more infamous on the Internet than To Catch a Predator. As a lot of you know, I'm writing a book related to To Catch a Predator and my research has led me to a lot of weird and fascinating places. One of these weird places is in the case of one of the most well known predators caught on the show, Lorne Armstrong.

A Brief Background on Lorne Armstrong

There is enough knowledge and documentation out there of his early life before getting caught on the show that it could be its' own separate post, but to give a bit of background on who this guy is before he got caught on the show here are a few things:

Lorne was a former member of the Air Force but the actual details behind his service are murky. He served for only a year before being discharged and he claims he was discharged because he failed a test and was told he would either be discharged or have to change his career in the Air Force. The actual truth is unknown.
Lorne has the nickname of "87" because he graduated 87 out of 87 in his high school class.
He was born and raised in Maine but at the time of the sting was living in Nashville because he has dreams of becoming a country music star, Whenever he had money he would go to karaoke bars and sing song after song thinking he had a wonderful voice. The real reason he fled Maine was because he scammed an elderly couple out of tens of thousands of dollars claiming he would renovate their home on the cheap. In reality he had none of the tools and his alcoholic brother stole a lot of the money so Lorne just left the state to avoid getting sued.
Before the sting, Lorne had been catfished by a woman pretending to be both a woman named Amanda James and her niece. Amanda James convinced Lorne to send her memorabilia of the NASCAR driver Dale Earnhardt Jr. among other gifts. Lorne apparently spent two years believing he was in a relationship with her before learning she was a catfish when his sister talked to Amanda James on the phone for a few seconds and figured it out immediately. No that's not an exaggeration. That's how dumb he is.

Falling In Love With a 13 Year Old Girl

As a newcomer to the city of Nashville with a completely empty apartment with no furniture:

Lorne didn't have a lot of activities to take up his free time as he was an unemployed bum living off the money remaining out of what he had stolen. So of course he spent a lot of time in Internet chatrooms talking up underaged girls. Lorne had actually talked up two other decoys from Perverted Justice ready to ensnare guys for the new episode of To Catch a Predator, but he wound up singling out a specific decoy who went by the name Kayla. Kayla is...weird. She's supposedly 13 but has the tone and vocabulary of a six year old. Maybe Lorne found that attractive as it would mean she would be easier to manipulate. Who's to say for sure.

This is how the conversation between the two starts:

It's important here to notice that the chatlog between the two is around 400 PAGES long. It would take far too long to break down every single day or moment of the chatlog, so I will just stick to a faint outline and the most memorable moments.

While Lorne is an absolute dumbass, he has enough braincells to formulate the beginning stages of grooming as evident here:

He tries to lure the decoy into a false sense of security by letting her know he is one of the "non-weirdos" and that she can trust him.

Here is where Lorne initially turns the conversation sexual. If you notice it takes less than two hours into talking before he feels comfortable enough to do it. The decoy playing as Kayle plays along and acts like she has no idea about s*x or masturbation beyond it hurting yet Lorne still pushes her towards it.

I'm going to fast-forward here because as I said this chatlog is ridiculously long and I'll hit the main points here.

Lorne tells Kayla to ask her dad to go shopping and buy a thong because when Lorne bought his underaged nieces a pair of tight shorts it made him feel good:

One reoccurring element in their chatlog is that Lorne is paranoid about the "Yahoo police" finding out what he is doing so he tells Kayla every night to delete her archives:

One of the more infamous moments in the entire chatlog is when Lorne gets jealous of Kayla's 13 year old ex, Derek:

To emphasize how stupid and pathetic Lorne is, here is a snippet where he opens his cam and shows off both sides of his brand new credit card to Kayla, bragging about the $300 limit:

Here Lorne professes his love for Kayla for the first time...after six days of chatting:

Lorne proposes that when they meet up Lorne could give Kayla a Walmart bracelet in exchange for a used pair of her panties:

Lorne explains to Kayla that if she were to swallow his semen she wouldn't be hungry anymore:

It's also important to notice that Lorne would have his cam on constantly and he would always be naked and have it pointed at his peepee. If Kayla clicked away from his cam he would get angry and tell her to click back. He referred to it as "Mr. Peepee":

Two days before their planned meeting Kayla tells Lorne her parents are both doctors. Lorne tells her that her mom could deliver their future children but not the dad because...well, you just have to read it:

Finally, on the day they're supposed to meet:

Oh, yeah, it's Lorne's birthday. The plan is to drive her from her mansion in Kentucky to his desolate, empty apartment in Nashville, where he'll spend the weekend having s*x with her on his mattress on the floor. Embarrassingly, he doesn't have enough money for gas to drive back and has to ask Kayla for some money that her parents have supposedly left her for the weekend alone. He makes the long drive to Kentucky ecstatic at the idea of being with his 13 year old girlfriend, completely unaware his real date is with Chris Hansen and law enforcement.

Part 2

In my next part I'll cover the actual sting and what happened there, what charges he was hit with, and some of what he went through in prison.

If you can't wait to see this guy's whole world crumble down here is the full, uncut sting segment with him.

If you're wondering how we have the full segment when we don't for so many others, Lorne sent it to a catfish since he had access to it as part of his defense. Not just any catfish, though. The second catfish pretending to be the decoy actress who greeted him at the sting. The second out of three different catfishes all pretending to be the same actress that interacted with him in the sting. And yes, he learned they were all catfishes and still fell for it two more times afterwards.

Trust me, this story gets insane.

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